Saturn Retrograde In Aquarius: What’s *Not* In A Friend

^^Quite possibly the most perfect Saturn Retrograde in Aquarius theme song: “I’m not your friend….”

In recent weeks, defining Saturn has turned retrograde in social Aquarius and as such it is a good time to be defining for ourselves what our deal-breakers or lines-in-the-sand are regarding friendships.  Saturn turning retrograde is an ideal time to say “no” to something; to turn a lesson down that we do not need in life.  Looking over our past experiences (because this is always the best teacher, no?) to inform our present and future, the next four months are a fertile time to be asking ourselves what we won’t put up with from friends anymore.  This will be different for everybody of course, but resonant themes might include things like the balance of time or effort towards working on the friendship, for example – if we feel like we’re always doing the work, or that we make more time for somebody than they make for us, this is probably a problem.  Other topics that can gain greater resonance at this time might include whether or not we can count on a friend to truly support us through challenging times (Saturn is so often hardship-related energy), or whether or not they act like a parent in attempting to control us/our life choices and thus fail to respect our free will – anything Saturn-oriented is inclined to take on a parental flavor.  Our friends are not required to agree with everything that we think, feel, or do – in fact, being able to occasionally “check” each other in healthy ways because we want the best for each other is something that sane and good friends should do. But we cannot direct others’ lives for them, either – the ability to respect boundaries and others’ right to learn from and through their mistakes is equally important.  Nobody wants a friend in their life who constantly tells them what to do or *not* do; that just smacks of a control issue – Saturn is bossy, authoritarian energy when not kept in check. 

I think perhaps the most important question to be asking ourselves at this time: If we were to have a problem with how a friend was treating us, would they take it seriously, conscientiously, and work on the issue?  Or would they perhaps instead be resistant toward being accountable for their behavior? If the answer is the latter, defining such a person as a “friend” could be unwarranted; an acquaintance, perhaps, but any friend of real substance or value can/will own their mistakes and work to strengthen the connection rather than become cold, aloof, & distant if/when we’ve told them a behavior isn’t working for us and we have instead found it alienating.  I think one of the social problems we all face these days results from the collective dilution in the definition of the word “friend” – social media platforms have made it easy to maintain a thin and detached definition of what friendship is. The ironic effect: Instead of social media being used for its highest purpose – which is to truly make society more connected – it has normalized a less caring, less involved level of interaction; just with a greater quantity of people. If Saturn teaches us anything, though, it is quality over quantity.  Always.

Saturn in Aquarius is the time to work on any problems in our friendships.  Should we fail to and thus be derelict in our duty in this regard, we then lose the right to be shocked/surprised when karma boomerangs back on us later and someone whom we’ve previously called a friend/relied upon for support suddenly doesn’t have the time for us or doesn’t want to put in the effort anymore – Saturn is known as the Lord of Karma for good reason.  Surely if this global period of social isolation has taught us all one thing, it is that life is short and – particularly as we age – nobody wants to be lonely and without tried-and-true friends they can depend on.  Since March 2020 Saturn in Aquarius has taught us much about the nature of our friendships and – more importantly – what we need to straighten out and get right in this area of our lives.  Boundaries and standards have come into vogue in this arena, as has looking at our own limitations, lacks, or stumbling blocks and where there may be some onus on us to up our game and be a better caliber of friend ourselves – taking personal responsibility for where we ourselves may have come up short is always a good look when Saturn is involved. 

But particularly now with Saturn having turned retrograde and the second of three squares between Saturn in Aquarius and socially-oriented Uranus peaking in just about an hour, it is a perfect time to be considering what’s *not* in a friend.   Just say “no” to qualities and characteristics in a friend that don’t make the cut and re-assess your level of commitment – it’s OK to re-classify someone in our friend zone and downgrade them to “associate” level if we’re having an ongoing problem with their behavior that seems resistant to resolution, or perhaps take time away from the friendship to re-assess whether it still has a purpose or use in our lives.  This can be tricky territory, however – low-vibration Saturn in Aquarius thinks nothing of using its social connections for personal or professional advancement in rather selfish ways that benefit the user.  Hi-functioning Saturn in Aquarius, however, sees the purpose of community  as being an opportunity for everybody to contribute and to be included in some way; regardless of how limited their capacity or role may be.   The latter honors each person’s humanity and respects their limitations; the former takes a very self-interested cut-and-dried approach to how their social connections facilitate or hinder their ambitions without considering what they themselves are or aren’t contributing.   All of these themes are very timely considerations at the moment.

06/14/2021

Mercury Retrograde Can Be Tough On Pets

Pets2I have written about this topic before in my monthly newsletter, but with respect to Mercury Retrograde it is worth paying attention to our pets whenever this planet is due to backtrack/is in “reverse” gear.  Mercury symbolically rules small animals, and when this planet is out-of-sorts so too can be our furry, feathered, or scaly little friends. This isn’t to cause us any undue worry; only to inspire us toward a little extra diligence before and during these cyclical periods in the name of possible prevention.  For example,  Mercury Retrograde could correlate with a health issue potentially surfacing in our pets. They might break their leash or run out of an open house door and thus wind up lost.  Some odd behavior can possibly crop up that – as their caretakers – we have never seen before.  They may chew/swallow/drink/inhale something they shouldn’t.  Dietary problems sometimes occur.  It is therefore a good idea to be extra attentive/attuned to our pets during these periods, keep a good eye on them so they don’t wind up going walkabout on us, monitor their surroundings for potential errant stimuli, avoid giving them new toys without supervision, and stick to their usual routines (including feeding; both timing and type/brand of food) at these times.

06/10/21

The Next Mercury Retrograde Mission, Part 2

Part 1 here.

There are many potential issues presented by the current Mercury Retrograde due its three square-offs with Neptune in Pisces before, during, and after the retrograde ends.  If you know anything about Neptune, one of the bigger challenges posed by this planet involves its inclination toward (self?)deceptiveness.  When you combine this with Mercury’s influence, multiply by two (or more); even the “little white lies” add up.  Because this is a square and not an opposition we are more likely to encounter this dishonesty within ourselves, but care should still be used when dealing with others during this retrograde nonetheless so that we do not take for granted the other party being upfront/above-board.  Low-vibration Neptune in Pisces tends toward denial of our less-than-savory character traits, but the fact that we all – to a greater or lesser degree – have them is universal to the human experience.  We *all* have “stuff” to work on; the shame lies in lying to ourselves about our faults because then we cannot possibly fix them.

DuplicityWhen Mercury Retrograde makes multiple contacts to Neptune in Pisces like this, it’s a cosmic call to look at character flaws like gossip, double-speak, lying, the spreading of misinformation, duplicity, having poor boundaries around our communications; from TMI to having “loose lips” and spilling secrets, and having disorganized or disordered mentalities about things.  Something is likely “wrong” – and by that, I simply mean non-functional – with the way we have been communicating or thinking.  So-called “magical thinking” can overtake the brain’s logic; mantras, affirmations, and visualizations are not a substitute for doing the work to clean up our messes, nor are they meant to be substitutes for help from a qualified mental healthcare provider.  Weird pseudo-spiritual “rationale” can infect our minds like a thought virus; although a concept may sound spiritual on a superficial level, please water-test it first by breaking down its various components to see if it is truly helpful and healthy or instead may be misguided.  Information tends to exist in a vacuum during this time and it is easier to think that something can be blanket-applied without taking into account our specific situation(s), fail to consider how accurate or sensible it is outside of a small bubble of micro-influence, or neglect to investigate whether or not there is accurate data to back it up. Yes, even if the info being presented is well-intended/meant to be “helpful”! Mercury in Gemini squaring off with Neptune in Pisces is a caution against drinking the “Kool-Aid” in an intellectual sense; it’s likely laced/spiked with something toxic.

Speaking without discernment – or discretion – is a problem during this retrograde.  Gossip, double-talk, the spreading of false or misleading information, speaking negatively about others when we think they are out of earshot, and/or generally having poor boundaries in our communications can ricochet back at us; causing sorrow and suffering for ourselves as well as others.  Divinity sees all of this,  even if we can’t/don’t/won’t admit wrongdoing to ourselves.  Whenever Neptune in Pisces touches something, there is often a certain amount of cowardice involved; what are we running from?

As far as the deceit portion of this energy goes, this is not to trivialize *at all* the suffering of those who have been victimized by it but perhaps one of the things most overlooked about dishonesty is the harm we ultimately wind up doing ourselves whenever we lie.  Consciously or subconsciously, our conscience knows this is not good for the soul; lying/hiding/omitting things damages not only our relationships with others (who will no doubt find us untrustworthy), but it hurts our spirit and the love and reverence that we have for ourselves.  It is hard to feel worthy of goodness when behaving in a way that we ourselves would not like to be treated.

Rather than continue this sad cycle ad infinitum, finding forgiveness for ourselves and redoubling our efforts to make amends by speaking only as we would like to be spoken to can help us to find redemption.  If any of the above have been character defects with which we have struggled, humbly acknowledging this weakness to ourselves while asking Divinity to help remove any fork in our tongue and instead guide us toward channeling our words in a more enlightened manner is the way to go during this retro. Apologizing and atoning via empathy, sensitivity, compassion, utter transparency, and in a way that truly serves the Highest Good of All is the way to approach.  We all make mistakes, but self-deception and the unhealthy behaviors that stem from this is a reversible one if we understand the multiple factors that can cause it and just take it “one day at a time” – recovery is possible.  Apologies matter now, but they do have to be more than just empty words.

06/10/2021

Saturn In Aquarius Square Uranus In Taurus: The Right (& Wrong) Uses Of Technology

TechnologyTechnology has always been a Uranian free-for-all; from the internet as a complete entity itself, to social media platforms, to the data being collected by apps and devices, it’s the wild wild west and always has been. Technology evolves faster than regulations – and dinosaur politicians – can keep up, and this isn’t a good thing when you have things like, say, a violent insurrection attempt to overthrow your government organizing/mobilizing on the likes of Parler, world leaders allowed to influence elections on Facebook, and our smartphones and apps collecting and selling vast troves of user data unchecked.  One of the main things Saturn does is test things for integrity – it pressurizes a situation and makes the stakes high while calling for the implementation of rules, codes of conduct/ethics, standards, laws, etc. Saturn is always a regulatory influence whenever something needs dat ass checked; it is the Cosmic PoPo, if you will.   Do the right thing  or face the consequences – it’s your choice, but fail to do so and there will be penalties enforced – nobody escapes Saturn’s karmic wheel; whether you pay in this lifetime, the next, or the hereafter, you will pay.  This is why its principles of self-regulation are so crucially important to learn – if we check ourselves, we will never need to externalize/outsource this to somebody else.

Now when Saturn resides community-minded Aquarius, communities – online and off – are called to police themselves; particularly against rogue elements not acting in accordance with the collective value system when this planet squares Uranus in Taurus.   Uranus is also extremely technology oriented, and perhaps when we have people like Apple’s Tim Cook – a high-profile leader in the technology sector (Saturn in Aquarius) – chastising the industry status quo and calling for reform at a recent speech at the end of January, the time has come:

“Technology does not need vast troves of personal data stitched together across dozens of websites and apps in order to succeed. Advertising existed and thrived for decades without it, and we’re here today because the path of least resistance is rarely the path of wisdom. If a business is built on misleading users on data exploitation, on choices that are no choices at all, then it does not deserve our praise. It deserves reform. We should not look away from the bigger picture. In a moment of rampant disinformation and conspiracy theories juiced by algorithms, we can no longer turn a blind eye to a theory of technology that says all engagement is good engagement, the longer the better, and all with the goal of collecting as much data as possible. Too many are still asking the question ‘How much can we get away with?’ when they need to be asking ‘What are the consequences?’

“What are the consequences of prioritizing conspiracy theories and violent incitement simply because of the high rates of engagement? What are the consequences of not just tolerating but rewarding content that undermines public trust in life-saving vaccinations? What are the consequences of seeing thousands of users joining extremist groups and then perpetuating an algorithm that recommends even more? It is long past time to stop pretending that this approach doesn’t come with a cost. A polarization of lost trust, and yes, of violence. A social dilemma cannot be allowed to become a social catastrophe.”

Regardless of what one thinks of Apple or of Mr. Cook, Tim is making a very timely point with this speech.  We also have platforms like Twitter and Facebook – way past a day late and a dollar short for sure – finally de-platforming the likes of Donald Trump et al; people who blatantly use social media for all the wrong ends/reasons.  I will bet you that Facebook’s & Twitter’s decisions to do this hinge not on the rightness or wrongness of the action, but of the potential financial and legal liability/repercussions for them to continue to allow it.  With Uranus in Taurus, change is, more often than not, all about the moo-lah.  Those citing freedom of speech concerns should know by now this only applies to government censorship; it does not apply to private citizens or companies – the First Amendment cannot be used as both a sword (to say whatever I want, however I want) and a cowards’ shield against social accountability.   You are free to express your views, however if someone doesn’t like them and tells you to GFY, your free speech rights are not being violated.  If you advocate violence against those of Asian descent and you get banned from an online community/platform, or fired from your job as a consequence, suck it up, Buttercup.  You can hold whatever wrong views you like, but others are not required to condone, uphold, or host while you spout off and possibly incite others. 

We see how this square affects things on a macro level, but what about on an individual level?  This is a prudent time to be evaluating – and re-evaluating – how we’ve been using technology; including the internet as a whole.  Is it a time-saver or a time-waster? Could we benefit from cutting back?  Is it keeping us connected to others, or is it locking us into communities that have problematic social dynamics?  Is it something that genuinely facilitates progress both socially in business, or are we capitalizing on the image of “wokeness” by merely virtue-signaling to a larger audience?  Are we using technology to create stronger, more unified communities or shrinking/fracturing society by excluding  – or worse, radicalizing – people?  Do we have a sense of personal ethics/ a code of conduct on the internet and social media, or do we demonstrate poorly socialized online behaviors?  This isn’t the 90’s anymore – times have changed and the internet has been around long enough for us to know that our virtual conduct needs to evolve beyond the adolescent stage.  What we’ve steadily been seeing, however (particularly in more recent times), is a collective devolution largely due our over-reliance on technologies and – more specifically – technology companies that really don’t have humanity’s best interests in mind or heart.  Ponder this for a bit while you’re deciding how much control you want technology to have over you.

05/05/2021

Adios, Jupiter In Aquarius: The Truth Will Set You Free

We have less than a fortnight remaining of Jupiter in Aquarius before it enters Pisces on May 13th and as it expends the last of its energy in this sign, the motto “The Truth Will Set You Free” has never rang, well,  truer.  Somewhere along the way during its passage though surprising Aquarius, it’s likely we’ve been hit by at least one shocking truth; possibly more  than one if we had several significant planets in our own astrological chart receiving a jolt from this energy. As shaken as we might have been/might be, we must remember the Truth is something that is ultimately meant to liberate when Jupiter passes through this sign.  At its best, this astrological placement gives us sudden clarity and objectivity that allows us to achieve massive evolutionary growth.  We become detached enough to see what’s best for us and seek greater independence as we change our beliefs nearly instantaneously. Our fortune also changes quickly under Jupiter Aquarius – freak luck can hit, but we can also wind up being this guy:

So if you’ve found yourself feeling more like  ^that guy up there^ during Jupiter’s passage through the Water Bearer, do what he suggests and remind yourself how lucky you are just to be alive.  Then realize all the truths that jolted you were meant to help you evolve – sometimes growth is disruptive, but it is necessary for a quantum leap upward.  Thank Jupiter in Aquarius for setting you free to find – and be – better.

05/02/2021

A Mars Retrograde In Aries Perspective On “Real Men”

Setting aside any potential Toxic Masculinity implications of the term aside, the retrograde of manly Mars through the ultra-masculine sign of Aries would like to have a few words with us on the subject of what a “real man” is and isn’t. Rx♂

Being a “Real Man” isn’t dependent upon what does or doesn’t dangle between your legs, the size of such organs, or whether you equate being “brave” with the willingness to take  foolish risks. It’s not about beating your (hairy?) chest in a show of bravado, or flexing your biceps until the sleeves of your shirt bust at the seams.  Mars retrograding in Aries would like to remind us all that a penis and testicles do not a man make, that emotional cowardice is a real thing, and prompts us to understand that those averse to taking emotional risks often seek to alleviate this hidden internal insecurity caused by a lack of inner strength by overcompensating with more obvious displays of outward might – see the red herring for what it is.

Being a “Real Man” isn’t about dominance – it is about setting an example; *being* that example. A “Real Man” serves as an exemplar of how to “stand up” in all senses of the word (properly and appropriately self-assert/be morally upright/be independent & self-reliant).  “He” isn’t afraid to tell other “men” to come correct when “he” sees them acting like an animal or a child.  A “Real Man” protects those in need of protection quickly and does not hesitate to be an “army of one” if need be.

Being a “Real Man” isn’t about hiding emotion; it is about being brave enough to show your true face in all ways; always.  It is being confident enough in your own strength to support and sustain others.  And it is the courage to be as you are and know with certainty that is how you were meant to live.  A “Real Man” takes swift, corrective action in his mistakes and possesses enough inner fortitude to apologize when warranted rather than viewing it as it being “weak” to say you’re sorry and seeking instead to “save face”.  A “Real Man” puts “his” best foot forward and eschews one-upmanship – “he” understands that there is no need for competition when you are secure in your ability to provide something of substance to the rest of the “pack”.  Being a “Real Man” is understanding that being powerful is a state of mind; not how many pounds you can bench press.  And lastly, it is an appreciation for the physicality of being alive without that physicality becoming a character handicap that defines your personality. 

Thus spake Retrograde Mars in Aries 🔥

10/11/2020

Saturn In Capricorn Square Chiron In Aries, Part 3

Hands up; who’s had the sense the sands of the hourglass are slipping through our fingers ever since Saturn arrived in Capricorn at the end of 2017?? As the current square between Saturn and Chiron continues this is not something likely to immediately let up and there’s a very real sense that no, we cannot do it all.  Maybe age is catching up with us.  Perhaps we’ve found ourselves limited with some kind of physical injury that gives us the painful realization this notion we *can* (or “should”) do it all is actually an incredibly ableist POV. It’s possible we’re dealing with severe professional pressure/angst.  Maybe instead it’s serious parental pressure/angst; either regarding our own parents or our role *as* a parent.  Perhaps we *are* a working parent and it’s a combination of these last two scenarios.  Whatever the case, it can hurt like hell to realize we can’t make time for *everything* on our list of priorities but something we want to be or do simply isn’t going to make the cut.  To manage this, we must figure out what is most important to us and create a personal hierarchy.  Though it sucks to cull something we just don’t have time for anymore, the alternative is continuing to live under the crushing weight of this immature notion that we can/should do it all and let it slowly squeeze the life out of us.  If you can, delegate. If you can’t, resolve to give something up for at least the next two years (i.e. the remainder of Saturn’s stay in Capricorn) because it’s not sustainable to carry on like this. Hopefully there’s something you can put on “hold” till later to help alleviate this pressure because time can indeed heal all wounds if we will but give some to ourselves.

**Read the previous installment in this series: Saturn In Capricorn Square Chiron In Aries, Part 2

08/29/2018

Mars Conjunct Saturn In Sadge: Punching Above Your Weight

Warrior planet Mars has been traversing Sagittarius since early March, but it is only now that we find The Red Planet coming within proximity to a conjunction with hefty Saturn, almost as if it were getting ready for some kind of huge and highly-publicized title fight. Though Mars retreats from this confrontation due his impending retrograde (which begins on April 17th) and this conjunction won’t get a chance to perfect until August, I keep seeing this duo factoring prominently in consultation lately and it has been calling to mind the concept of “punching above your weight” – let me explain…

In Traditional astrology, Mars & Saturn are considered malefics; i.e. generally speaking wherever these guys go in the chart, Trouble tends to follow. It’s not as if they are without their positive facets; it’s just that – as a first order – what you are inclined to get is conflict (Mars) and adversity (Saturn). Can these be overcome? Absolutely. But I think when these two celestial bodies join together to form an astrological Tag Team of Tribulation, it is only good sense to be on the lookout for problematic manifestations.

When I see this duo expressing their energies within the confines of a specific house or concentrating their energies upon a certain planet, I feel there is a real possibility of finding ourselves at some kind of competitive disadvantage in that area of life. For example, we may literally be going up against a stronger opponent; someone with a better reputation, more status, authority, or general clout. This isn’t meant to inspire fear; rather to instill an appropriate level of respect for the challenges we may be up against in a given area of life – particularly if we find ourselves outranked/outclassed in some way. So before initiating some kind of conflict (especially a legal one with both malefics in litigious Sadge) that could blow up and carry big consequences, I think it’s important to pause and check the ego. Because when Mars occupies this sign, the default inclination may be to operate from a place of moralistic “right fighting”. It is certainly one thing to fight for Justice and/or Truth, but it’s quite another to identify the ego so strongly with the principle of being “right” that we fail to see the warning signs that advise “Danger Ahead”.

Remember Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out for the NES back in the day? Playing this dude named Little Mac & invariably getting your ass kicked the first time you went up against old Iron Mike? Yeah, that.

Mars combining with Saturn can so often lend itself to an “Enforcer” type of vibe, and especially if we find ourselves placing our perception of Truth up against someone else’s, this can indeed be a recipe for Trouble when righteousness runs amok. We may get so focused upon what someone else is doing “wrong” that we could lose sight of our own behavior (and thus the broader ramifications that may come of this) in the process. This isn’t a time to let a beef become something bigger than it needs to be – ideally, we manage it at an optimally appropriate level whenever possible. If for some reason these containment measures aren’t enough and we wind up legitimately needing to escalate it, we do so gradually and with a full understanding of the totality of what we’re up against.

Pausing to show beneficial self-restraint while considering the big-picture perspective of whether or not – in the Grand Scheme of Things – this is a philosophical hill worth metaphorically dying upon can help us avoid bigger problems down the road….I’m thinking potential scenarios that could entail damage to things like our reputation or bigger long-term career prospects, for example. Because this to me looks like it can have all the makings of a public and high-profile fight of some kind….perhaps one of biblical proportions, even. It’s not that David can’t overcome Goliath; it’s just that before we find ourselves in a “punching above our weight” kind of scenario, it’s prudent to take a step back and consider whether we really want a conflict to become a potentially defining moment/event in our lives. If this is indeed something we must do, then preparation and timing will be key – train hard and make sure to land a solid hit at the most opportune moment possible. A sling may also help. 😉

Be advised the energy of this conjunction will be loosely in effect throughout April, but it returns for a rematch in August which will be the true Main Event.

04/01/2016

Synchronicity Under The Libra New Moon

The Universe is absolutely amazing sometimes…! Tonight while at my yoga class just ahead of the impending Libra New Love Moon, my teacher happened to have this song on the playlist:

Lyrics:

“Remove all fear;
Come from where you are to here.
Let your eyes
Meet mine.
For a moment let your heart be mine.

Come to me, I will take away your sorrow.
Come to me, I will open your tomorrow.
Come to me, I will open up your heart.
Come to me, we will never be apart.

May love mesmerize your soul.
May the devas make you whole.
Can you align yourself in constant devotion;
Find your liberation?

The tears of kindness come
When you love everyone.
Your precious soul is finally found.
Love, infinite love, brings you ‘round….

Come to me, I will take away your sorrow.
Come to me, I will open your tomorrow.
Come to me, I will open up your heart.
Come to me, we will never be apart.”

What a lovely, sweet, and fitting message for the Libra New Moon now upon us…! If there had been any doubt in my mind about this correlation, it was promptly dispelled when I noted the name of the album this song came from – “Wings of Peace”! Peace is such a Libra theme, and perhaps with winged messenger Mercury also residing in this sign (on the fated North Node, no less..!) this message was meant to be shared tonight  ❤

10/12/2015

Today’s Feminist Post, Brought To You By Venus Trine Uranus

BAM! A radiant and revolutionary Venus for the Aquarian Age – *LOVE* it!

VenusInLeo

I mean, holy Venus in Leo – what a muse….! The hair, head-held-high attitude, use of the word “glorious”….I’m not sure you get much more Venus in Leo than this (well, maybe if she were wearing a crown, LOL). Add that in-your-face liberated edge from Uranus in Aries, and I suppose this is what you wind up with – so perfect for the final trine between Venus in Leo and Uranus in Aries that is about to be exact tonight. As the Sun slips into mutual reception with Venus, no less….you go, girl!

09/22/2015