Hands up; who’s had the sense the sands of the hourglass are slipping through our fingers ever since Saturn arrived in Capricorn at the end of 2017?? As the current square between Saturn and Chiron continues this is not something likely to immediately let up and there’s a very real sense that no, we cannot do it all. Maybe age is catching up with us. Perhaps we’ve found ourselves limited with some kind of physical injury that gives us the painful realization this notion we *can* (or “should”) do it all is actually an incredibly ableist POV. It’s possible we’re dealing with severe professional pressure/angst. Maybe instead it’s serious parental pressure/angst; either regarding our own parents or our role *as* a parent. Perhaps we *are* a working parent and it’s a combination of these last two scenarios. Whatever the case, it can hurt like hell to realize we can’t make time for *everything* on our list of priorities but something we want to be or do simply isn’t going to make the cut. To manage this, we must figure out what is most important to us and create a personal hierarchy. Though it sucks to cull something we just don’t have time for anymore, the alternative is continuing to live under the crushing weight of this immature notion that we can/should do it all and let it slowly squeeze the life out of us. If you can, delegate. If you can’t, resolve to give something up for at least the next two years (i.e. the remainder of Saturn’s stay in Capricorn) because it’s not sustainable to carry on like this. Hopefully there’s something you can put on “hold” till later to help alleviate this pressure because time can indeed heal all wounds if we will but give some to ourselves.
So we’ve already spoken about one potential manifestation of the current square between Saturn in Capricorn and Chiron in Aries in Part 1 of this series. Another wound this vibe tends to exacerbate is a tendency toward over-responsibility where we take on onerous burdens and try to shoulder a load all by ourselves. Aries energy tends toward D.I.Y (“Lemme do it MYSELF!!!”) but with Chiron here this tends to be the result of an old injury; the friction generated by Saturn in Capricorn is almost like an “eldest child” type of vibe where it feels like we never got/get to be what we want(ed) to be. We tend to just accept what’s expected of us by our parents, teachers, or others whom we respect without necessarily considering if it’s something we even *want* for ourselves as we fall in line with a sense of utter resignation and follow orders. Until that one day when we have the sudden epiphany of “Eff you; I won’t do what ya yell me!” – there’s a definite clash between old-school and new-school with this vibe and the pain that results from this conflict can be our greatest teacher. It will not, however, be easy. But nothing worth having ever is, and thankfully both Aries and Capricorn energy tend to be up for a challenge – the product of this may be a hard-won sense of sagacity beyond our years.
With Saturn arriving in Capricorn back in December and Chiron only just entering Aries this past April, these two celestial bodies have largely managed to avoid clashing with each other in their respective new surroundings. It’s almost as if they were taking their time getting acquainted with their new zodiac digs first, but with Saturn now at the tail-end of its retrograde reversing it all the way back to 2 degrees of Capricorn where it threatens to back into frictional contact with Chiron, these two cosmic contenders are currently getting on each other’s nerves.
What’s the beef? Simple – Chiron is in an infantile sign (Aries; AKA the Newborn of the zodiac) while Saturn is the uber adult in Capricorn. Like a baby screaming in frustration and/or pain over hunger, a diaper that needs to be changed, or god knows what else, one cosmic energy operates from a very base simplistic level that’s apt to be angry/reactive while the other is cold and supremely self-controlled. Note that neither behavior is inherently “better” than the other; it’s just they have two totally different modes of operating where neither really understands the other. Age isn’t a factor either; exactly who is being the “adult” and who is behaving childishly in a given situation may have nothing to do at all with how old we are or our familial role/hierarchy because when we are in pain the delineating line that separates “the men from the boys” often goes right out the window completely independent of age or gender.
So how does this energy manifest? Well speaking of family roles, parental wounds tend to (re?)surface for one. Ever feel like you’re dealing with a brick wall when it comes to Mom and/or Dad? Brace for impact, because this vibe is likely to exacerbate such dynamics. Paternal relationships are particularly sensitized by Chiron’s coarse brushing; fatherly energy resonating strongly with the Saturn archetype. Relationships with teacher/mentor or elder/elderly figures can be similarly affected by this square. Now this is just a caution; *not* a fatalistic pronouncement that nothing can be done about such situations if they indeed arise. If scenarios like this do happen, though, it’s an opportunity for us to heal an (old?) injury and gain wisdom regarding what *not* to do the next time around. And there may not even be a next time; this square never quiiiiiiite perfects even though it comes close. So there’s a sense of learning some kind of lesson through this painful experience in a way that fortifies us and makes us wiser.
What is that lesson? It can vary, but the utility of caution/restraint/healthy boundaries is certainly an important consideration. Metaphorically, if we can see inflammation acting as sort of a “Police line; do not cross” yellow caution tape we’ll get a pretty good idea of what’s a safe level to engage at vs. that which is decidedly off-limits. On the flip side, Saturn tends to be overly restrictive/repressive in Capricorn so it can also be about figuring out what the “safe container” is to hold that pain. Perhaps it’s calling in a pro; some kind of coach or therapeutic figure who can hold the appropriate space for us to unpack that baggage and come up with a management plan. Maybe it’s agreeing only to engage at a respectful level and one of bare necessity. Painful as this reality is to acknowledge, sometimes the best relationship we can have with others is either 1) a no-frills one or 2) none at all – sometimes there’s a limit to the amount of healing that can be achieved and it’s safest for one or both part(y)(ies) to stay in their own lanes at a respectful distance; especially if/when the effort is one-sided. They say that “Time heals all wounds” and though it can indeed be a balm of sorts, it’s far from a cure-all and at times despite the wait and generous amounts of elbow grease we apply in service to healing we can still hit a wall; especially when this entails dealing with those who are stuck in rigid/outdated ways of being/doing. Some are not driven to heal; they can only get as far as they can on *their* individual healing journey and we can’t measure this against *our* yardstick. Saturn’s primary function is to define limits, so it’s better to recognize the barrier/impediment for what it is in order to preserve our sanity; issuing an internal cease & desist order to ourselves regarding our expectations about what that relationship can/should be. Sometimes we have to take it on the chin and accept the “L”; even if/when it hurts – simply take as a lesson on how *not* to do/be.
We’ve already spoken of Chiron in Aries and its battle wounds in a previous post, but something unique is happening on this front courtesy of the present Mars retrograde. Mars rules Aries – the sign Chiron is presently traversing through – so that’s one layer of it. But we have an additional level of interconnectedness between these two celestial energies at the moment that is continuing to play out because Mars makes repeated contact to Chiron due The Red Planet’s back-and-forth retrograde motion.
These astrological contacts – which perfect(ed) in alignment on May 20th, August 3rd, & September 13th – are facilitating an opportunity for us to revisit ancient battle wounds/the scene of old skirmishes (in this life and/or those past) to find new opportunities for self-healing; especially if we focus on how we can be or do differently in the Now/going forward. We may not be able to change the past, but we absolutely *can* review any repeated points of conflict or contention in our lives – including any shrapnel wounds we may have sustained way back when – to excavate/excise. It’s not unlike exploratory surgery in a kind of way; we may not know quite what we’re getting into/going to find, but we’re pretty clear on the fact that something weird is going on that will need to be patched up or “sutured” for closure.
As for where to start on this healing journey, begin with things that make you angry. Examine the reaction to anger and explore any possible triggers rooted in past experiences while maintaining a sense of intellectual detachment that keeps it cool enough to handle. This is nothing to fear; in these déjà vu moments bear in mind the potential this energy has for recalibrating healthy self-assertion because there is an opportunity to radically initiate an entirely different way of being/doing. Some are very uncomfortable with this emotion and see it in a negative light as generating static or chaos. But when proactively handled, it can also be a force for change that liberates us from stuck ways of being or doing so we don’t attract chronic injuries that result in the (re-)formation of new scar tissue. There’s only so many time we can go through the same incision point….
“I don’t want to be the one
The battles always choose
‘Cause inside I realize
That I’m the one confused
I don’t know what’s worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don’t know why I instigate
And say what I don’t mean
I don’t know how I got this way
I know it’s not alright
So I’m breaking the habit
I’m breaking the habit
-Linkin Park, “Breaking the Habit”
Such perfect lyrics for this particular astrological placement! The battle wounds suffered by the Chiron in Aries generation (those born between April of ’68 – March of ’77) are apt to manifest as a bit of a Wounded Warrior complex; particularly as it relates to anger. Generally the issues with this placement of Chiron tend to relate the concept of healthy self-assertion, where one knows how to stand up for themselves without going ballistic. The position of and aspects to Mars are critical to examine and especially so if any astrological contact is made between Mars and Chiron. Investigation of the Red Planet can give us an idea of whether or not one struggles to assert themselves and thus allows themselves to be dominated by bullies (which one is likely to continue being faced with until they learn how to muster the bravery to stand up to them), sweeps it under the rug and pretends it isn’t there (until it is and then oh boy look out!), or perhaps errs on the side of having an explosive hair-trigger temper that redlines at the slightest provocation. With Chiron in Aries there can sometimes be a tendency to perceive an affront where none is intended, then react on the premise that “The best defense is a good offense”. One may find themselves embroiled in conflict, which from a spiritual point of view actually serves to push the soul toward healing wherever end of this spectrum they may be struggling with. Regardless of whether one chronically runs from confrontation or instead instigates it, healthy integration of the “Warrior” archetype is an integral component of Chiron’s “Medicine” when it is found in Aries.